Answers

1. Question #1: How do I know whether to tell my 7 year old child that his uncle committed suicide?

   Chances are that the child either already knows or will find out by listening to the adults around him. So be honest, ask what he would like to know,and answer his questions to the best of your ability.

   Don't be afraid to say "I don't know" if you don't know. If you avoid the topic, he may think that there are subjects about which he cannot talk. This can cause a child to look for suicide facts by other methods to deal with his questions and feelings about death.

   It is usually a healthy approach to reinforce the child's willingness to talk and create a safe environment for him to explore his thoughts and emotions.

[Back to the top]

2. Question #2: How do I know if someone is at risk for suicide?

   There are many risk factors for suicide. Certainly if someone has threatened suicide or has made a previous attempt, expressions of suicidal thoughts should be taken seriously.

   It is always appropriate to have the advice of a mental health professional. Recent losses, history of suicide in the family or social circle, depression or other mental illnesses are important risk factors.

[Back to the top]

3. Question #3: What do I say to someone who is coping with suicide of a child?

   Unless you have lost a child to suicide yourself, you can not possibly know what that parent is experiencing. Your supportive presence is more meaningful than anything you could say.

   That being said, a comment like "This must be unbearable for you," or "I can't imagine the pain you must be feeling right now" are supportive, nonjudgmental, and do not minimize the loss.

[Back to the top]

4. Question #4: What do suicide facts say about age groups more likely to commit suicide than others?

   Suicide facts reveal that there is a greater incidence in those age 15-24 and in people over 65. Also, adult males make up approximately 80% of suicides in the US annually.

[Back to the top]



5. Question #5: Is suicide more common in one part of the world than another?

   Suicide facts and statistics from the World Health Organization indicate that suicide rates are higher in Australia and the Balkan States, and lower in South American nations. Data are three to four years old because of the time it takes to tabulate the numbers. North America is in the middle.


[Back to the top]

6. Question #6: Why do some people seem to handle grief better than others?

   The grief response is affected by many factors. All of them play a role in the way we respond to a particular loss. Suicide facts are only one factor. In death losses, some of the issues that make a difference are the strength of the connection to the deceased, the role they played in your life, and the length of time you have known them.

   The degree of dependence you had on the person emotionally, physically and economically also plays a key role in the way we handle the loss.

[Back to the top]

7. Question #7: What is the most helpful thing I can do for my son whose schoolmate has just died?

   Provide a safe arena for him to discuss whatever he is feeling or thinking. This is not a time for value judgments, or criticisms of the way he interprets the event, gently offer suicide facts and wait for responses.

   It is important that he is able to talk to you and have you listen. This doesn't mean that you agree with all of his thoughts or 'approve' of his feelings, just that you can listen while he sorts it all out, and then when he asks for help, you can offer your ideas about the available suicide facts and statistics.

[Back to the top]

8. Question #8: What does it mean to be "stuck" in grief?

   Many times people who are bereaved by a death or other loss get stuck. This occurs when the grief process is interrupted and can have many causes.

   If one parent is widowed, for instance, it may be difficult to address his or her needs for grief time and still be the primary support person for the surviving children. Another common factor is the absence of a road map, or a guide to help the griever know what to do.

[Back to the top]

9. Question #9: Do you provide services on the internet?

   I do not provide nursing services at this time. As a Nurse Practitioner, I only treat those on whom I can keep an individual record. I feel it is necessary to do a face-to-face evaluation in order to diagnose mental disorders,and develop a meaningful treatment plan with the client.

   That being said, I do provide email teaching of EFT for use in stress management. This is a new service that I provide as a personal life coach.

   ( Stay tuned to this website for more news and the opportunity to use my personal coaching expertise.)

   [Back to the top]

10. Question #10: How can I find a local counselor experienced in coping with suicide grief?

    I believe the best way to find a counselor who meets your personal needs, grief or otherwise, is to do a brief interview by email or over the telephone prior to the first appointment. I frequently will speak to a client over the telephone to answer general questions they may have about my qualifications or my approach to various issues. The client can get a feel for the therapist's manner, and I can be honest about what I can and cannot do for them.

[Back to the top]

11. Question #11: What is a PMHNP?

    PMHNP stands for Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse Practitioner. PNP is Pediatric Nurse Practitioner and there needed to be a differentiation. A Nurse Practitioner is a Registered Nurse who usually will have a Master's Degree in the specialty of practice.

    In Oregon, Nurse Practitioners practice independently of physicians, and are accountable to the State Board of Nursing. We have prescriptive privileges and some of us have dispensing privileges.

    This means we can prescribe medications for the conditions that we treat, and are allowed to dispense free medications supplied by pharmaceutical companies for clients who qualify for assistance programs.

[Back to the top]